Chapter 132: Place in the world

"I have never met anyone more inclined to rash decisions than you, Edward." Sirilonwe, as often seemed to be the case, was styling herself as the voice of reason in my life: "You cannot seriously mean to just walk into Vivec's Palace and ask him how to kill Dagoth Ur."

After telling Nibani Maesa what I truly thought about the Nerevarine prophecies, Sirilonwe and I had left the Urshilaku camp immediately - without speaking another word to anyone. I doubted that I could ever go back there, after what I had said - not without violence, at any rate.

I was obsessed, you could probably say. I just had to see to it that House Dagoth was destroyed: I could not stand the thought of all those Dunmer people lured by their sleeping and waking dreams to sickening places like Telasero; where they would likely die or become corrupted by Corprus.

"Vivec must know." I insisted. "I don't know who else I can turn to in this - and I don't know what I would do if House Dagoth is left to continue like it is. Look, Siri; knowing what you do about what's really happening to this place - to Vvardenfell, I mean - what else can we do?"

I think that what Sirilonwe had seen of the disfigured Sixth House monsters in Kogoruhn influenced her in my favour; she eventually agreed to my plan.


Not that it was much of a plan, really.

We stood outside Vivec's domed palace, at the southernmost tip of the holy city; readying ourselves to go in. The palace exterior was deserted; it was quite late at night, after all. The lack of guardsmen might have been puzzling, were the occupant of that palace not a living god. Lord Vivec needed no bodyguards, I was sure.


With sight augmented by the magical, vampiric blood in my veins, I looked through the single small door to the palace - with its complex lock and powerful electrical trap - and saw, or perhaps felt, a single, pulsating power inside. It had to be Vivec; and he was alone.

I felt a powerful sense of trepidation as I backed away to a safe distance and magically neutralised the lock and the trap. If the man-god inside objected strongly to our intrusion, we would likely not have a chance to retreat. To reassure myself as much as Sirilonwe, I said, with an attempted grin:

"I've read that Vivec is compassionate - so as long as we're polite..."

She only clenched her teeth, and followed me inside.


Vivec stared at me for what seemed like a long time, his large eyes not blinking once. He did not shine with divine light, or speak with a booming voice as I might have expected; but the sense of presence he exuded was almost unbearable. I felt helplessly drawn towards him, a feeling very similar to being dragged inexorably out to sea by the tide. An unpleasant feeling.

He looked much like an unusually tall Dunmer, and wore only a loin-cloth, a couple of arm-bands, and bonemold and chiton pauldrons - attached to a heavy golden necklace. Perhaps the strangest aspect of his appearance was his skin: it was two colours, rather than one. The left half of his body was grey, like the Dunmer; and the right half was golden, like the Altmer (only perhaps a little more bronzed). The colours met in a dead-straight line down his body: right from the top of his head, all the way down to his pelvis. He was sitting cross-legged and floating, unsupported, in the air above a three-sided dais.

As we stood and stared at the man-god, seemingly unable to say a single thing, Vivec raised one hand, and pointed at me. I suddenly felt afraid - I knew I was in great danger.

"You are uninvited." Vivec said, his voice flat and emotionless. "Why are you here?"

"Sorry for the intrusion," I said tentatively; somewhat cowed, "but the priests would never have allowed me in to see you had I simply asked."

"There are very good reasons for that, vampire. My attention must be on this land's enemy."

I shifted my weight. Suddenly I was feeling very weak; as if my strength was flowing out and into Vivec.

"That is why I'm here!" I struggled. "I've seen the Sixth House - I've fought the Sixth House. I want Dagoth Ur's destruction, and... I know about Kagrenac's Tools."

Vivec's expression did not change, but I was feeling still weaker. I fell to my knees, and realised I could feel something wet and sticky running into my mouth: my nose was bleeding.

"Edward..." Sirilonwe whispered, a pleading note in her voice. Her hands were tight on my shoulders.

"You do not endear yourself to me by speaking of our eternal shame;" Vivec said, still in his emotionless monotone; "but... I see your mind now."

At that, the horrible sensation of my strength leaving me stopped abruptly, and I was able to stand again. The man-god continued:

"You sincerely wish the end of Dagoth Ur."

There was a long pause, in which I steadied myself and wiped the blood from my face. My nose had stopped its spontaneous bleeding. Vivec's hand was resting on his knee once more.

"Why did you become a vampire?" He asked eventually. "Was it to escape death? Mortality?"

"I was dying." I replied, nodding slowly and carefully - worried at what would happen if I offended him somehow. "I wanted an escape from that."

Vivec nodded too, and said, surprisingly:

"I know how you felt... Mortality is a cruel reward at the end of a life dedicated to finding time for worthwhile and just endeavours. You said you know of Kagrenac's Tools; from accounts in the Apographa, no doubt. There is some truth in those accounts - so I would presume that you know of the manner in which Almalexia, Sotha Sil.... Dagoth Ur - and I - came into divine power?"

I recounted briefly what I had learned from the 'Kagrenac's Tools' essay that abbot Barelo had given me: about Wraithguard, Sunder and Keening - and the heart of the dead god Lorkhan. Vivec confirmed all this with a wordless nod, and then - again - said something I was not expecting:

"Have you ever tried to kill yourself?" He asked, darkly.

I was taken aback, and all that came to mind was:

"Well, there was that trick to the Puzzle Canal underneath your palace." I replied, frowning. That 'trick' - which essentially involved drowning oneself in the Puzzle Canal, to be revived near a secret shrine associated with the Pilgrimage of the Seven Graces - was quite an unpleasant memory for me.

Vivec grimaced slightly - the first expression of emotion I had seen him make.

"Yes... that test was constructed in the spirit of what I wanted to - one day - have the willpower to do. Well - perhaps want is the wrong word."

The man-god paused again - apparently lost in thought; even though his eyes never blinked, and never left mine.


"Destroying the heart of Lorkhan is the only way to strip Dagoth Ur of his immortality." Vivec said eventually. "I have known this for a very long time. The reason Almalexia, Sotha Sil and I have not done this ourselves is because destroying the heart would be akin to suicide for us. We too would be stripped of our divine powers; and in time - perhaps only a short time - we would die."

It all made sense - destroy the source of Dagoth Ur's power to destroy him. I thought I could also understand why it had not already happened: and what Vivec said next let me know that I was right:

"This is the shame I spoke of. The need for our eventual self-destruction was established when we first took the power of the heart - but until recently we deluded ourselves that we could escape this fate; Almalexia, Sotha Sil and I. Until recently, Dagoth Ur slept beneath the mountain." Vivec sighed - an odd sound, that gave the impression of a building settling. "Now he has awoken, and an army stirs in his shadow. We lost the chance to quietly do what was necessary by ourselves - in secret - and now raising a force to storm the heart-chamber would necessitate the disclosure of our shame to the world. For I do not think that - even now - Sotha Sil, Almalexia or I would have the strength of will to end it ourselves."

Vivec gazed at Sirilonwe and I with renewed intensity.

"I know who you are now. You - both of you - have power, but no real allegiance - nothing and no-one that would prevent you from..." He trailed off, and left the sentence hanging. "Yes, you have your 'ranks' in your guild of mages, but I can see that it means little to you: now, if not always. You have power; few in this land could stand against you - but you are still in the world. I have studied the immortals of Morrowind - and some are superior to you. The dark, ancient vampires deep in their holes in the ground: they could crush you - or almost anything they chose. But they do not: they stay in their holes, bored and waiting for the world outside to end."

"No - you are not all-powerful, Frost: but you still need this world - and that may be enough."